Thursday, September 19, 2013

I Have to be Beautiful

It's no secret I struggle with confidence. When people tell me I am beautiful I feel embarrassed like they are saying it out of pity or something. I have to find it in my myself, but not just for myself. I gave birth to four of the best looking kids in the world. Two boys and two girls. 
My oldest daughter made me realize I had to stop talking about body image with words like fat and skinny and use the word healthy instead. Still that didn't change my own self image. My second daughter is making me do that. Every single day she looks more like me. From her scrunchy medium sized nose, big cheeks that make her eyes squint when she smiles, to her slightly pushed back jawline, to her squishy arms and sturdy legs to her perfect little oddly shaped toes. She is my mini-me and she is so beautiful. She is one of the prettiest girls in the whole world. She lights up a room and makes my heart swell when she smiles. The way she looks at me a grins when people tell her she looks like her mama. How proud she is to look like me. Like me, the woman who picks herself apart until there is nothing worthwhile left. Who until recently had to fight back tears when some took her picture. Who makes noises of disgust when she looks in the mirror. If I am saying how unattractive I am, how I don't like how I look and think I am not worthwhile what am I telling her? What will she start to hear when people tell her she looks like me? She needs to hear that her mom is beautiful and she is beautiful. So that's it, I just have to be beautiful. Wish me luck figuring that one out!!


Monday, September 2, 2013

I Have Broken Buttons

I find it so fascinating the steps that happen in a bad break up. Usually the worst break ups were once intense, passionate relationships. When things went bad, they went very bad, and you find yourself hating the other person with as much passion as you once loved them. Then one day, it all stops. The feelings end. You just don't even care anymore. That person could stand in front of you pushing all the buttons they have worn out over the years. It won't work though, those buttons are finally broken. For moment, you are sad that it doesn't hurt because at least you felt something for them, as odd as it sounds. This is your starting point. Now you realize you get to choose how you feel, how you react to life is no longer side tracked by a button pusher. Every once in awhile, if your button pusher is very dedicated they will find one that if pushed hard enough will still work. Acknowledge it hurts, move on and realize that button pusher is just an ass. At least in my experience.

Sunday, January 27, 2013

I Organize Hair Accessories

 My girls can never ever find anything. They have my issue of putting something away somewhere "safe" and then not remembering where that place is. I am also pretty convinced there is a troll that leaves things in my way when I don't need them then makes them disappear the second I do need them.
One of my goals this week is to get my princesses organized well enough that they may avoid these issues as they grow up. I only hope it is not too late. So today I made them a place to keep all their hair accessories.

 There are a million and one tutorials for headband storage on Pinterest, you can find them here. I am adding mine to the mix. If you follow my blog you know I have a crazy amount of fabric on my hands. You may also know I really only make instant oatmeal, however there was a Nesquick can awaiting recycling. I gathered my fabric (choose something that won't show the can through cause that is ugly), my spray mount that I use to make double sided paper for my custom pinwheels, scissors and can. Cut your fabric big enough to cover the can and edges of can.



 I am not exactly a fan of ironing but it is really worth it to press your edges and make sure the surface it free of wrinkles.

 

 I used the hot glue gun to attach the fabric at the edge so I didn't have to worry about spraying and positioning at the same time. Then I took it outside and used to piece of old cardboard to prevent any over spray (this stuff is STINKY and STICKY). Little by little I sprayed, pulled tight and smoothed. It is adjustable for roughly the first 20 seconds. I recommend giving the can a pre spray. I over sprayed on the first line and it bled through the fabric. Luckily it dried fairly well and was along the seam which will be placed against the wall anyway. The fabric I chose by chance is incredibly forgiving for this project.
Ugly over spray mark right after it happened.








By the time I finished the rest of the can and brought it in the spot was almost all gone. Then I hot glued the other seam, overlapping the fabric.











Same with the edges along the top and bottom. Going little by little around the bottom, glue and press, glue and press. Keep in mind this is the bottom and you want to sit flat.

The Nesquick can has a little lip around the top which I actually like because I could glue under the lip and press the fabric along the under side so you couldn't see the edge when you look down into it.














Here it is finished and on their dresser. Inside are their hairbrushes and a few clips, and their headbands fit perfect with out stretching!